Buying, Moving and Owning Nothing
For the last three weeks of my life, everything has been about moving, money and materials. Cardboard boxes, clear packaging tape and cylinders of bubble wrap. The latter as much for the cat as it is for those items we’ve deemed fragile. Our cat not among the fragile, but the treasured.
Navigating a regulatory real estate obstacle course of selling our house while buying another one that better aligns with our goals, lifestyle and values, e.g. a smaller footprint, no yard and a reasonably priced HOA to handle everything outside of our walls. A pleasant compromise as I get older.
This was our fifth time in fifteen years as a couple and my, well let’s just say numerous time over fifty-eight years of I’m moving out. This cycle of settlement and separation began in my twenties. When moving consisted of a few suitcases, plastic milk crates, used furniture and a friends pick-up truck. All the ingredients for a sad country ballad or an angst-ridden punk song.
Thirty years later, I would find myself with my little family moving across the USA. A lifetimes worth of stuff loaded into oversized crates and transported on a semi-truck to be driven 1800 miles to our new house. A lifetimes worth of stuff paid for by being away from my little family.
Moving is often cited as one of the most stressful situations we’ll experience. One that usually involves our most financially significant purchase. But more importantly, it means letting go of the place and space where moments were manufactured and memories created. Family gatherings, flashbacks to the people and pets who have passed and the everyday experience of living in that particular residence and in a specific community.
A lifetime of learning to put down roots that I know will inevitably be pulled out by the forces of change. Everything in the universe is in motion. Nothing is static including our lives.
I no longer make bold declarations that this house or condo will be my forever home. Having been proven wrong on more than one occasion. Change is inevitable and as much as we try, we cannot predict or control our futures. God is both builder and proprietor of all things in the cosmos including me and you. My forever home has and always will be with God, my creator.
A long life earned epiphany that we really own nothing in this world. Everything is temporary about this earthly realm, including our lives. Everything in this world is a gift from above; sustenance, suits and skins, and shelter; life, liberty, and love.
One of many “aha” moments when I humbled my heart and surrendered my soul only to God. A battle worn life that’s still being tested and tempted by the Deceiver. A life that belongs to God alone.
Maybe this new house will be my final stop in this world; a possibility for any of us during any given day. Only God knows our departure date because only God knew our arrival date. What I do know, is that God will provide for both the temporary and the eternal.
While we don’t own anything in this world, we are responsible for everything in this world. Starting with ourselves and our own lives. As followers of Jesus, we are called to a life that honors God by loving ourselves and others, even our enemies.
We are God’s representatives here on earth. Caretakers, not owners. Tasked with responsibly managing ourselves and our families while being good stewards of the earth and all its gifts. Every person is a God given gift even if they or we don’t immediately recognize it.
I have finally accepted that all things in this world will pass, including where I lay my head; only Love will endure. My relationships, my career, my status, my possessions, all the things that used to define me have also slipped away from me. Vanishing into the shadows of that inevitable dark night of the soul.
No longer trying to hold onto stuff to define me, my life is now about letting go of things I no longer believe I need, like a big house with a big swimming pool. Relieving myself of the obligations required to carry a thirty mortgage in exchange for living in a house that’s paid off. A house that’s our home for now, until change arrives once again on our doorstep for our next move, no matter where that may lead. God is forever with all of us.