Before you read any further let me make a disclaimer. These written words are borne out of self-reflection not a saintly rebuke. My life has been both a litany of love and a lesson in non-love.
Like all humans I have failed and fallen and floundered. I am a man whose been humbled by life and hugged by Love. I am a man who wrestles and writes about a faith no longer rooted in myself or a purpose planted purely in this world. I am a new man wanting to truly treat others like I would want to be treated. I am a man bound to Love.
I’m also a man wrestling with thoughts that I ignored when my income depended on ignorance, no matter the injustice. Thoughts that would eventually end my involvement in a profession that richly rewarded me. Thoughts that prevented me from continuing my life’s living; the marketing of medicine.
My past profession being pharmaceutical marketing. A uniquely American vocation, besides New Zealand. The marriage of spin and science.
A profession where success is measured by sales, not safety. A profession bankrolled by Americans paying the highest pharmaceutical drug costs in the world. A profession that encourages a system of sickness as opposed to a process of prevention. A profession with a proven past of practiced perjury; pedaling products that have maimed and murdered millions.
Sadly, the previous paragraph isn’t poetic license but lived pain. Real-life suffering that’s killed hundreds of thousands and harmed millions. Some of these murdering medications include Bextra, Vioxx and Rezulin to name a just a few.
Then there’s the millions of innocent people and their families that are injured by vaccines and other products that haven’t been withdrawn from the market. Lastly, there’s the opioid crisis. From 1999-2023, approximately 806,000 people have died from an opioid overdose. Death and devastation funded by some of America’s top pharma manufacturers.
This limited list of dangerous drugs includes both past products and former clients of mine. My agency helping to power sales on products that were eventually withdrawn because of safety concerns. Safety concerns we refuted and repudiated because our loyalty was solely to sales.
Creating sales aids and marketing materials to convince science skeptics that these products were safe and effective. Crafting financial incentives to prescribe pharma products even if it meant compromising patient health. Constructing narratives that blamed product misuse because of patient abuse, not the fact that the product was defective or deadly, sometimes by design.
A symptom of my spiritual awakening is rediscovering my necessity to ask why when things in the world don’t make sense when viewed through a lens of love. Why were pharma executives not held criminally liable for their harmful actions? Why do certain pharma companies still exist when they have repeatedly broken the law? Why are American patients and taxpayers paying the highest drug costs in the world while the rest of the world pays pennies? Why are we sicker than ever after spending billions and billions of dollars on prescription drugs and vaccines?
Whenever anyone questioned my chosen career, I dismissed that person through name calling or attacking their credibility. I allied my unquestioned vocational loyalty with politicians, physicians, and people who were financially conflicted. I defended a profession that profits by maintaining a status quo of sickness, as opposed to seeking sensible solutions to improve heath and lower drug costs.
I ignored this cabal of crime because my daily bread depended on it. I ignored ceaseless stories of suffering because I stopped asking why. I lived in feigned ignorance because I believed only in myself and my success. I choose something other than Love; I choose hurting as opposed to healing.
I remember in college grappling with the question of how could a “Christian” society degenerate into Nazism or Communism. Two sides of the same sadistic and cruel coin.
Naively thinking why weren’t people asking why while seeing these terrible events unfold? Why didn’t the “good” people say something or even stop it? A case study and conversation that baffled me than, but no longer bewilders me when I think about my life and my past profession.
I know that some readers might dismiss my comparison as ridiculous and preposterous, but the ONLY difference between these anti-human political movements and pharmaceutical marketing is the scope of suffering.
I’ve always considered myself a good person. I’ve never physically hurt someone. I’ve always tried to follow the rules. And I supported a system of sickness and suffering because I stopped asking why.
Because I’ve surrendered my life to Love, I know that good is a struggle not my life’s steadfast status. I have and will fail in my attempt to create more love in the world but I’m trying. I’m again asking why and acting on it because I am certain that God is love.
Peace. God loves you.